Meditation on Sounds

Today after my yoga practice, I opened the front door and sat near the doorway to meditate. This is one of those wonderful spring mornings that makes me feel like I could go outside and soak up all the green goodness in the world into the pores of my skin.

Except it's raining, so I sat in the doorway and looked out. Our front door looks out onto a small screened in porch, then out to a big grassy area with massive old oak trees, then across a small private road to my neighbor's rock wall. As I looked further, I realized I could just barely beneath the oak branches and the rock wall see my neighbor's front steps and part of their doorway.

I've been trying to learn to meditate for what seems like a long time now, but really have had no clue what that means. After reading An Accidental Buddhist and some other books, I'm starting to understand that it just means sitting--sitting and being aware.

As I sat in the doorway, I became aware of how many sounds I could hear. A dozen different birds, wind in tree branches, rain hitting oak leaves, rain water tricking down gutters and downspouts, a motorcycle in the distance, a train far away, the wind chime on the porch, and my iPod playing some simple flute music in the house.

I began to wonder what makes some sounds pleasant and others not. I wish I knew more about the science of sound. I know that sound is vibrations in traveling through the air and hitting my ear drums and some tiny little bones in my inner ear. But I don't know why the sounds this morning would make me feel calm and peaceful as compared to Friday.

Friday I had to go to oncology for another shot since my beta levels have not gone back to normal. I was prepared for it to be like last time, with maybe one other person there, but relatively quiet so I could read and relax after the shot while the nurses watch my reaction to the medicine.

Instead it was very busy. There were lots of people, most of them looked like they were there to stay for a long while since they were hooked to iv's and were watching tv or reading. The tv's were somewhat loud, but the worst was the ringing of the cell phones and the loud conversations that followed.

Don't get me wrong, I love my cell phone. It allows me to be where I want when I want and not have to sit in an office somewhere. And I wouldn't deny that freedom from anyone else. But as I sat in my recliner and tried to read Being Peace, a book about learning to live a compassionate and peaceful life, I wondered why I wanted to go smash everyone else's cell phone. I tried to tell myself that all these other people were probably a lot sicker than me and needed my compassion, and I felt that for the people, but not for the cell phones. The obnoxious ringing tones, and why when people answer their cell phones, do they seem to talk much louder than they do to the person sitting right next to them?

Anyway I shouldn't end on this note, otherwise it will spoil this great beginning to a new day. So I need to put my oar back in the water and steer myself back to this moment right now, thinking about all the beautiful sounds and vibrations in the world that I can hear right now. Flutes, birds, rain, and wind. And maybe the sound of an omelet cooking in a pan in the kitchen.